Right now, for me and many others, the world is feeling especially dark. More senseless violence on the big scale and the small. Nighttime darkness descends pretty quickly by 5 p.m. The news is heavy. The challenges feel relentless. And for those of us already managing chronic illness, caregiving, or simply trying to make it through the day—all this darkness can feel suffocating.
So how do we lift ourselves up? How do we keep ourselves going when everything feels pretty friggin’ bleak?
Well, here’s my answer: I try to have fun. Even tiny bits of it. Especially tiny bits of it.
I’m talking about small “juicy” joys—the kind that don’t require energy we don’t have, money we can’t spare, or time that doesn’t exist. Little moments of warmth and lightness that remind us we’re still here, still capable of delight, still tending our inner fires even when the world feels cold.
1. Turn Your Morning Coffee (or Tea) Into a Ritual of Warmth
Most of us drink something in the morning—coffee, tea, water, whatever gets us going. But what if we made it more intentional? More delicious? More ours?
About two years ago, I cleaned out my coffee mug collection (we can talk decluttering another time) and promised myself to contain them to one shelf only (so they better be ones I really love!). I fell in love with Rae Dunn mugs because well, I’m a writer and I love words. Each morning, I get to select a mug that serves as my mantra/attitude/wish for the day—”own your magic,” “bliss,” “hot mama,” “lots o’luck” are just a few I get to pick from. Their vibe helps align mine.
While the coffee brews, I say a small affirmation or simply set an intention for the day. Something like “I’m allowed to take up space today” or “I will find one moment of joy.”
I’m working to create a special spot too to drink it… a cozy corner that feels a little sacred. Even if it’s just for five minutes before chaos descends.
The point: We’re not adding a task. We’re adding intention and pleasure to something we’re already doing. That’s doable, even on our hardest days.
2. Engage Your Sense of Smell Throughout the Day
Smell is powerful. It can shift my mood almost instantly, ground me in the present moment, and create a sense of warmth even when everything else feels cold.
I keep my favorite perfume on my desk. When I need to shift my energy—when I’m stressed, stuck, or spiraling—I give myself a little spray. It’s a tiny luxury, a scent I chose because it makes me feel like my aspirational self. Sometimes I apply a scented hand cream or lip balm instead. The act of pausing to do something that feels good for my body, that smells beautiful, reminds me that I’m still here and I still matter to take care of.
I have another favorite scent ritual in the kitchen. I keep a small handpainted spice box from Israel at my stove—it’s decorated with pomegranates, which are special to me. Inside are cloves. This is actually a b’samim box, traditionally used in the Jewish Havdalah ceremony that marks the end of Shabbat.
The sweet aroma of the cloves is said to serve three purposes: to comfort the soul as the special holiness of the day departs, to carry sweetness and joy into the new week ahead, and to revitalize and invigorate as the holy day transitions to ordinary days. The little box does all three for me, often. As I stand there cooking—both morning and night—I pick up the box and smell the cloves. It’s a spiritual pick-me-up that takes just a moment but last a good deal longer.
Other ways to engage our sense of smell:
– Light a candle before entering our workspace (even if it’s the kitchen table)
– Use an essential oil roller on your wrists or temples
– Spray a room spray with aromatherapy benefits
– Keep a small sachet of lavender or eucalyptus nearby to breathe in when you need to reset
The point: These are small acts, but they create moments of sensory pleasure that can lift us out of the darkness for a breath or two. And sometimes a breath is enough.
3. Pick a Midday Song to Move Your Body (Even Just a Little)
I know, I know—we’re tired. We’re busy. We don’t have time for a dance party. But hear me out: pick one song for the week. Just one. Your midday anthem. And when you hit that afternoon slump or that moment when you want to scream, put it on and move.
For five minutes. Three minutes. Honestly, even one minute counts.
Groove in your kitchen. Shimmy while folding laundry. Dance with your kids or your dog or just by yourself. Move your body in a way that feels good, not like exercise but like play. Like shifting the energy that’s gotten stuck and heavy.
The point: Movement shifts our physiology. Music shifts our mood. Together, they can help us shake off some of that darkness, literally. And yes, this counts even if you’re dancing while sitting down due to pain or fatigue. Any movement that feels joyful counts.
4. Get Into the Sunshine (However You Can)
I know this one is challenging, especially for those of us who are full-time workers or caregivers. We can’t always just step outside for a sunshine break. But even small doses of natural light can help keep the darkness at bay.
Can you take your lunch near a window? Can you step outside for two minutes while something reheats? Can you sit in your car in a sunny spot for a brief moment before heading into the store?
If you truly can’t get outside—maybe you’re bedbound, housebound, or your schedule is that locked down—can you sit near a window for a few minutes? Open the curtains wide and let the light in, even if it’s winter light, even if it’s brief.
The point: We’re not aiming for a perfect outdoor yoga session or half hour tea break. We’re aiming for any contact with natural light that we can manage. Our bodies and spirits need it, especially in the dark months.
5. Make Something Mundane Feel Fun (Even Ridiculously So)
Here’s my confession: sometimes we eat dinner right off the baking sheet. No plates. We make a pan of roasted vegetables and meat, bring it to the table, and just eat from there with forks. It feels fun, kind of like camping. And honestly? It makes cleanup so much easier for me, and that matters when I’m already exhausted.
We blow indoor bubbles sometimes. We have impromptu five-minute dance parties in the kitchen. I introduce my son to old comedies I love. We have ukeleles and tamborines and boxing gloves at the ready. We do things that feel a little silly, a little unconventional, a little lighter than our usual heavy routine.
Other ideas:
– Eat breakfast for dinner (because rules are made up anyway)
– Use the fancy dishes on a random Tuesday (confession: I use them every day!)
– Wear something that makes you feel good even if you’re not leaving the house
– Put on lipstick or earrings just for a video call
– Sing ridiculous songs about mundane tasks to the pets – they secretly love them
– Set the table with candles even though it’s just another weeknight
The point: We’re allowed to make our own joy. We’re allowed to be playful and unconventional and do things that make life feel lighter, even when the world is heavy. Especially then.
When the World Feels Dark, We Get to Choose Light
I know, these small joys won’t fix everything. They won’t solve the big problems or erase the darkness in the world. They won’t cure our illnesses or eliminate our responsibilities or make the hard things easy.
But they can keep our inner fires going. They do offer up small bits of kindling. They can shift our energy just enough to keep going, remembering we deserve light even when the world seems to only want to offer us darkness.
Small fires can add light. They create warmth. They remind us we’re awesomely alive.
So here’s to finding joy in the small things. Here’s to making our own light when the world feels dark. Here’s to stoking our inner fires, one tiny act of pleasure at a time.
What small joys are you finding these days? I’d love to hear what’s keeping your fire burning.
Until the firelight calls you back,
Jeny